The Recovery Writer

Championing Diversity Empowering Recovery And Inspiring change

Category: Health & Well-being (Page 1 of 7)

The Comfort Zone And Why It Is An Illusion

Anxiety is such an exhausting beast. To venture outside my comfort zone, with it turning cartwheels in my gut, often feels like too much of an ask. Anxiety says that to keep it quiet, I must do as it commands. I must avoid all risks, avoid new people, and always say no to anything I’ve never done before, for fear of looking like an idiot. Anxiety tells me this is the way to feel comfortable and prevent mental pain. Anxiety is a big fat liar. 

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Flexible Working and Mental Health

mental health and flexible working

Flexible working and studying plays a key role in managing mymental health. Living with, and managing mental health challenges, is of itself a full-time job. I have to work hard each day to balance all the things I need to do, with making sure my mental health stays stable. Being self-aware, noticing and nipping negative thoughts in the bud, monitoring my anxiety, encouraging myself to sit with it, but not too long as to avoid a two day burn out. These are just a few of the things I have to do on a daily basis to stay well. Trying to do this around a set work or study schedule, is impossible and has caused me to fail many times. 

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Stress Management – Using Organization Tools

Stress management using organisation tools

One of my biggest anxiety triggers is when I feel overwhelmed by appointments and personal admin. If I don’t catch this quickly, it can soon spiral out of control. I initially feel anxious because of the number of things I need to do, the anxiety then sends me into an avoidant mode and I can’t face any tasks, the tasks then grow, and so the cycle continues.  

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Learning To Manage Hypothyroidism Fatigue

Resisting The Urge To Quit

This weeks self-care theme has largely been about resisting the urge to quit. I am still exhausted due to the ongoing hypothyroidism fatigue. This is making it practically impossible to do anything.

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Self-kindness And Mental Health

Whilst kindness to others is something most people keep at the forefront of their mind, practicing self-kindness can be too easy to forget. I am often guilty of beating myself up about things or demanding things which I would never be as hard to someone else about.

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Self Reflection For Personal Development

Developing the skill of self-reflection is key in overcoming mental health challenges. We need to know ourselves first, in order to know how best to move forward in our personal development. 

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Suicide And The LGBTQ+ Community

Preventing Suicide In The LGBTQ Community 

I am unfortunately no stranger to suicide. I have a history of mental health problems, and I have made many attempts on my life. I am also both transgender and gay, which puts me in one of the highest at-risk communities for mental health issues and suicide. This means that over my lifetime, I have lost many friends to suicide and seen countless more attempt it. We need to address this now. 

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Anxiety And The Benefits of Doing Things That Scare You

How to overcome anxiety

“Do one thing every day that scares you”

This is a line from ‘Everybody’s Free (to Wear Sunscreen)’ a spoken word song by Baz Luhrmann. In learning to live with anxiety,  that particular line has stuck with me and has become somewhat of a mantra

This is surprising really as it runs contrary to my old mantra of ‘Drink one bottle of wine a day and hide from your fears.’ I lie.

It was never only one bottle.

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Getting Creative – Day 119 of #365daysofselfcare

This blog is part of the #365daysofselfcare challenge

Self-care is spending time with your creative self

PicsArt_08-29-04.59.00.jpgCreativity allows us to express hidden parts of ourselves and connect with our inner self.  Most importantly, creativity reminds us how fabulous we human beings are, that we can create such amazing things from inside ourselves, and that life is full of fascinating creations.

I am a very creative person, I always have been, but for a long time, I forgot this. During my recovery,  no longer having my inner world dulled by the haze of drugs and alcohol, I have discovered this side of myself again.

My love of creativity is why it makes so much sense for me to move forward and turn my hobby of writing and making videos into a freelance writing career. For me, even on a severe mental health day, most of the time I can still write. That is because for me,  creativity is not work, its a self-care for my soul.

Creativity does not have to be perfect, the best part of creativity is that it is best when not perfect. It is at its finest when you just let go and let whats inside come out in whichever creative outlet you choose.

Buy some play-doh, doodle on a blank page, start a journal, or invest in an adult coloring book and make it a mission to spend time with yourself, letting your fascinating soul run free.


Be Your Fabulous Self – Day 104-106 of #365daysofselfcare 

This blog is part of the #365daysofselfcare challenge

Self-care is being true to who you are despite the judgments of others

The most radical act of self-care is to give yourself permission to be yourself.

The last few days I’ve been reflecting on just how wonderfully free it feels to be me, even though a large part of society is not particularly happy with who l am.

It’s a strange paradox. Before l came out as trans, l couldn’t handle the judgments of others, l was an anxious people pleaser, and this was one of the hurdles to coming out. I was so scared of being rejected by everyone.

As I have progressed through my transition and become more comfortable in my skin, I have begun to care less and less about what other people think of me.

Surprisingly, this isn’t because my transition has made me blend more into society. It could have done, and I was most certainly expecting it to be one of the benefits. However, what has happened as I have become more comfortable, is that I have developed into a chap with a very flamboyant personality who enjoys wearing pink, wearing earrings, and generally being and doing many things that society says men shouldn’t be or do. I’ve also now come out as gay, which adds an extra layer of difference into the diversity sandwich.

This freedom to be me now permeates every aspect of my life, and it continues to be one of the most powerful daily self-care tools in my wellness toolkit.

Nothing Is Permenent- Day 99 of #365daysofselfcare 

This blog is part of the #365daysofselfcare challenge

Self-care is remembering that no obstacle is permanent

PicsArt_08-06-09.01.30.pngThis week is a big one for me (no pun intended!) as I have a second attempt of my final stage of lower surgery.

The most significant act of self-care I can give myself right now is to forget everything that went wrong before and start with a new perspective.  Also,  that whatever happens, obstacles pass, things change, and all will be well eventually!

Love Is A Doing Word – Day 97 and 98 of #365daysofselfcare

This blog is part of the #365daysofselfcare challenge

Self-care is choosing to give our hearts to people who show their love for us in action and not just in words.

IMG_20180805_131339_882.jpgLove is such a powerful emotion, it’s hard to stay mindful with such strong feelings but the stronger the emotion, the more aware you must be.
I have a history of poor relationship choices. I was in such a poor emotional and mental state that I  often left myself open to being hurt and mistreated. In recovery, I have learned to be more discerning about who I open my heart and give my love too.
Love can be such an easy word to say, but without action it is meaningless. As the saying goes, ‘Love is a doing word.’ In assessing my connections with people now, I listen less to what they say and focus more on what they do. It is in peoples actions that you find their true feelings and intentions.

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