I currently receive Universal Credit, as my mental health challenges have made it difficult to do paid work. In beginning to explore the New Enterprise Allowance, as part of my plan to gradually withdraw from Universal Credit and become self-employed, the first step is to attend an introductory seminar. After meeting with my work coach a week earlier, I received a date to attend on the 5th December.
Reflecting is a habit I enjoy and is a key tool for managing my mental health. I find it useful to look back and see where I’ve been, to better understand where I’m going. Reflecting at the end of a year helps me to acknowledge my achievements, big and small. Spending time reflecting in a constructive
As most of you know, this year I have been exploring new ways to return to paid employment. Specifically, I have been considering the idea of self employment. My biggest passion is mental health recovery. I love sharing my story of gender transition and recovery from addiction. Inspiring people to make changes to their own lives gives me great joy. I wanted to turn what I love doing, into a way to make a living and I have spent 2018 exploring how exactly I might do that. (Thank you for your patience with me!)
Flexible working and studying plays a key role in managing
In beginning freelance writing, I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing. I mean I know what I’m doing, but I don’t know if I am doing it right. Yes, I have read a lot of books, articles, posts etc, but I still feel like I am feeling my way around in the dark. Its exciting and terrifying all at once.
Its been a while since I updated about my professional writing progress. And, as you can see by the title of this blog post, I have some rather fantastic news to share!
When I decided I wanted to start writing for a living, my main obstacle was self-doubt. I put off sending pitches to editors and publishers because I thought I should wait until I was a better writer. The trouble is that I am my own worst critic, being a perfectionist comes as naturally to me as breathing. Therefore I often never feel good enough and fail to even start because of this self-doubt.
Having declared myself to be a writer, I now need to develop this into a business which will allow me to write for a living. Currently, I am not quite sure what that will look like. However, it helps me to remember that I have a lot of experience.
If you are familiar with me across all my other social media platforms, then you may have noticed some changes happening. I’ve been fiddling about with header images, taglines, personal bio’s and generally spamming your news-feed with all these changes (sorry about that!). Lots of you have been asking, “What’s going on?”
Grab yourself a cup of tea and a biscuit and let me tell you.
2016, in many respects, has not been the greatest of years, both in my own personal life and in the world at large. It has been a very mixed bag of a year. Being as public as l am, most people are aware of my personal circumstances this year, however, only a small handful know the full details of the exact goings on. In my recovery I have learnt some valuable tools, the most helpful one being to keep my side of the street clean, which l try very much to live by. It’s been tough, because I’ve felt at times that being nice often doesn’t get you as far as you like, but what it does get me is peace of mind and the knowledge that I’ve done the next right thing.
Not making the full goings on public has also meant that I have truly discovered who my most trusted and loyal friends are. l work hard to keep upbeat, which is essential for my ability to stay sober and clean and maintain my recovery, but it’s not been easy. I’ve been the closest to a drink in this year than I have for a few years now and Christmas turned out to be tougher than l initially thought it would be. However, the special people in my life noticed this without me having to say so and have been my rock, you know who you are and l am so grateful for you in my life.
It certainly is true that you find out who your true friends are when disaster strikes and this has been the case for me. The love and support shown to me by my friends both nearby and online, has moved me to tears at many times throughout this year. I survived the most difficult of tests to my sobriety and mental health because of the many ways you expressed your love and support for me and there are not enough words to convey how much that means to me.
My own journey and the hard hitting loss of so many big names in 2016, has really hammered home what’s important in life, to cherish every moment and to spend time and energy on people and things that matter and walk away with love from those that don’t. l have an open heart and welcome warmly those who want to be in my life and want me in theirs, those that live by mutual respect, support and understanding and find as much joy in my life as I do in theirs. I will no longer waste my time on people that don’t live this way, I do not judge you, l simply am judging what I need in my life and what’s good for me.
It really has been one of those years of transformation and opportunity emerging from some very painful events. Moving to a new part of the UK was definitely not on my 2016 agenda but it has been the best move I have ever made and I have begun to make some wonderful friends here in Devon who have made the move so much easier and helped me to feel welcome and at home. So while it has been a hard year, the fruits of good things have sprouted from it which l hope will go on to fully flower in 2017. Thank you to all my friends, for the encouragement in all the new adventures that have begun to happen this year. I’ve begun to believe in myself and most importantly, I’ve begun to feel able to say that out loud because of the special people that have reminded me of and championed my abilities and talents
Thank you to my wonderful friends who are such a blessing in my life, who walk this journey of life with me and allow me to walk in theirs. l hope 2017 brings you happiness, love and all the wonderful things you deserve.
Love and light
Finn
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