Why does it always feel awkward to blow our own trumpets? I have been recently nominated, for the LGBT+ Positive Role Model award in the National Diversity Awards. This is an incredible honor and achievement; I am extremely proud. However, I have been finding it hard to post publicly about it. Every time I do, I feel embarrassed. Why is this? Why am I embarrassed about sharing my accomplishment and pride?
Learning to Share My Achievements
Awkwardness when sharing my achievements has frequently been an issue for me throughout my life. I think it’s partly due to my experiences growing up, and partly due to messages received from our culture and society. I had to work hard on this issue, especially in becoming self-employed, and needing to promote myself.
Over the last few years, I have got much better at owning my achievements. Generally, I feel more able to speak highly of myself, my qualities, and my successes. However, this is still a work in progress.
Reflecting on my feelings around self-promotion, the embarrassment and awkwardness mainly arise from a sense that I must be humble. I worry that mentioning achievements, especially publicly, will be seen as bragging or boasting. I value humility, it is a quality I like in myself. But left unchecked, it can harm us. Let me explain why.
Overcoming Self-Sabotage
Keeping quiet about our qualities and achievements does us no favors. All it does is render us invisible. The message we give ourselves from keeping quiet is that we are not worth being seen and acknowledged. Similarly, downplaying our achievements also does us harm. This is something I am especially guilty of doing. I have learned to not keep quiet, but instead, I make statements like, “shameless self-promotion alert…” or “I don’t want to boast but.” These statements dilute the depth of pride in the achievement. Sharing something you are proud about with those statements in front, does not sound very proud does it!
This isn’t humility, this is a lack of self-belief and self-esteem. Whilst I am no longer actively self-sabotaging, this is self-sabotage nonetheless.
The Importance of Sharing My Achievements
I have been reflecting on my hesitancy to share and yesterday I had a huge realization. The award is about being a positive role model and a role model is someone who leads by example. How can I even consider myself to be a worthy candidate if I can’t proudly share my own achievements without feeling embarrassed!
I also realized that much of how I struggle to celebrate my achievements has similarities to how it can feel to be LGBT+. It is even more important therefore that I can lead by example in overcoming low self-esteem, self-belief, and shame.
Overcoming Shame
AS LGBT+ people we often have to go through hell and back, just to be ourselves. The stigma in society tells us that who we are is wrong. We often cannot be our true selves visibly, for fear of being harmed. This leads us to feel ashamed and to feel our only option is to stay invisible and hide.
As an LGBT+ role model, I talk openly about my own journey through this. I share about how that shame kept me from being myself for the first half of my life and the dark place that took me to. Growing up I thought that there was something fundamentally wrong about me and that I was destined to never be happy or achieve anything in my life. I spent the first half of my life extremely mentally unwell, self-medicating with drugs and alcohol, and searching for a way out.
Recognising my Achievements
In 2010 I decided enough was enough. I began recovery and got clean and sober. With a sober head, I was able to work through what was going on. I came out as trans and began my gender transition. This was the beginning of a completely new way of life for me which resulted in incredible changes. Over the last ten years, I have achieved things I never thought possible. I returned to education and gained a first-class honors degree, I started my own business, and I have just written and published my first book. Now, I cannot get enough of life. I am full of passion, ambition, and a ton of joy!
All the work I do in the LGBT+ community is about paying my joy and gratitude for life forward. In being able to turn my life around, all I want to do now is help to inspire, motivate, and support others to make their own changes. Sharing my story, creating resources, and supporting people, is about challenging stigma and inspiring people to be proud of who they are.
In that case, sharing about my most recent achievement is vital because this is another tool I can use to help others. If I can overcome all I have, and be nominated for an award, then sharing this can inspire others to see that change is possible and happy life is attainable
I Am Proud To Be An LGBT+ Positive Role Model Nominee!
Therefore, there will be no more embarrassment and awkwardness about sharing my achievements. No more keeping quiet about it. No more qualifying it with a weakening statement. l am going to share that I am immensely proud and honored to have been nominated for the Positive Role Model Award (LGBT+) by the National Diversity Awards.
To have been recognized for the work I do and nominated for this award, makes me feel grateful, blessed, and bursting with pride. A huge thank you to everyone for your nominations. Reading your words leaves me feeling emotional, in a good way! If you would like to vote/nominate me you can do that here.
Do check out all the other nominees and catcgories too. There are a ton of inceredible people doing amazing work, and I feel honoured to be included amoung them.
Be Proud of Your Achievements!
If you have achieved something, if there is something about yourself that you are proud of, be your own cheerleader and tell people. You deserve to feel proud and be seen fr the incredible person you are! If you want to practice here, then let me know what you are proud of in the comments below.
Hello! My name is Finn and I have a passion for creating honest content, that inspires personal growth and promotes well-being.
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