Finlay Games

Change Your Life- A Guide On How To Begin

On 10/25/2019

A long deserted road stretching out for miles in the dessert towards a vast mountain range. Text overlay reads, changing your life, a guide on how to start out on the journey of change

I am incredibly passionate about change and share about my own changes often. I have changed my entire life, in a relatively short space of time. From addiction to recovery, from living as female to transitioning to male, from being held back by poor mental health to learning to live my life around it. These profound changes have made me passionate about helping and inspiring others to make changes in their own lives. Often, when I talk with people about change, the common response is, ‘How did you change your life? I don’t know how to begin’. Therefore, in this blog, I want to answer that question. Whilst I would love to offer you a magic ingredient, it is not in my power! Instead, I can share the things that I have found helpful in my change journey. I hope you find them helpful too.

Writing for A Living – A Progress Update

By Finlay Games

On 10/19/2019

In Career and Study

Progress chart on a table, text overlay reads, writing for a living, reviewing my goals

A little while ago, I decided I wanted to explore the option of writing for a living. Since that time, I have been on an incredible self-employment adventure! In today’s blog, I want to reflect on the goals I initially set and evaluate how things have turned out. Although this blog is more of a reflective piece, perhaps sharing my process may also be useful to someone who is in a similar position*.

Why Coming Out Day is Difficult When You’re Transgender

By Finlay Games

On 10/11/2019

In LGBTQ+ Life

Person running with a transgender flag. Text read, coming out day why its hard when you're trans

I find myself torn between pride and concern on Coming Out Day. On the one hand, I love that our society has evolved to the point that we now celebrate people coming out. On the other hand, I wish it wasn’t a big deal. I look forward to the day where it doesn’t matter what our sexual orientation or gender identity is. A day when we just accept that people can fall in love with other people of any gender. A day when we also realise that gender isn’t straight forward and for some people, they need to define themselves differently. I can dream.

The Benefits Of Sharing My Mental Health Story

By Finlay Games

On 10/07/2019

In Mental Health

Finlay Games smiling at the camera. text reads why I share my mental health story

This week is Mental Health Awareness Week and I want to talk about why I began to share my mental health story. I also want to talk about why I think it is still important that I continue to do so. This blog has been written in support of the This Is Me campaign, which aims to raise awareness and change attitudes about mental health, by the sharing of personal stories.

Take Out The Trash | Spring Cleaning My Life

By Finlay Games

On 09/19/2019

In Mental Health

Hand wearing a rubber glove holding a bright yellow cleaning spray bottle. Text over the top read, take out the trash, spring cleaning my life using the konmari method

Over the years since I began my recovery, I have been consciously invested in my self-growth. I love that feeling of shifting and changing and learning new things about myself. Sometimes, I will experience a sudden shift, seemingly out of the blue. A sudden shift is what appears to be happening to me at the moment, and I feel it is time to do some spring cleaning of my life.

Feeling Stressed? R.E.D.U.C.E For Mental Health

By Finlay Games

On 08/28/2019

In Mental Health

A person sat on a jetty looking out across a lake which is surrounded by mountains. Text reads reduce. an acronym to manage stress

Stress is problematic for us all. Left unchecked, stress can lead to increased anxiety and low mood. However, when you have existing mental health challenges, being mindful of stress becomes even more critical. In my mental health journey, I have learned that I must deal with stress quickly, to avoid any negative impact on my wellbeing. To do this, I created the acronym R.E.D.U.C.E to remind myself what I need to do to take care of myself as soon as I notice I am feeling stressed.

How to Choose Your Top Surgery Surgeon

By Finlay Games

On 08/22/2019

In Top Surgery

Surgeons face covered with mask, text overlay reads top surgery, how to choose your surgeon

Chest dysphoria is extremely painful and understandably we want to find a surgeon as quickly as possible. However, it is important to take time to decide, so you can find the most suitable top surgery surgeon for your needs. In the following blog, I am going to share how I found my surgeon. I hope that these tips will help you to begin your own research process.

Sober Life is Far From Boring (An Announcement!)

By Finlay Games

On 08/18/2019

In Mental Health

Finlay Games holding an alcoholics anonymous 24 hour sobriety chip. Text reads , sober life is far from boring

I feel compelled to write this blog to share some incredible news with you all. This week, I received the official confirmation, that I am to be a TEDx Open University speaker! This news comes at a poignant time for me, because this week, I also celebrate nine years clean and sober. Being given such an incredible opportunity stands as a testament to how far I have come. And to think, I worried that my sober life would be boring!

5 Tips for Coping With Waiting Times in Gender Transition

By Finlay Games

On 08/14/2019

In Gender Transition

Long Waiting Times and The Impact on Our Mental Health

The hardest part of going through gender transition is coping with long waiting times. We wait for our first referral, for appointments in between, for hormones and surgery if we chose it. The relief first felt at realising we are trans, is soon replaced with anguish. The road ahead seems impossibly long and the mountain too high to climb. Understandably, our mental health often suffers as a result. Therefore, if we are to survive this process intact, we must learn ways to cope with the wait. In the following blog, I will share the top five things which helped me to get through my gender transition.

Phalloplasty Sensation Progress Over Time

By Finlay Games

On 08/09/2019

In Phalloplasty

Background image of colorful fireworks text reads phalloplasty sensation recovery

Phalloplasty, in being such a complicated procedure, comes with a lot of possible complications. A major concern for a lot of transgender people considering this surgery is the risk of loss of sensation. Losing sensation was certainly something I feared. However, thankfully, my fears have not been realised. In the following blog, I map out my phalloplasty sensation progress over the four years since I had my first stage phalloplasty.

Distraction Techniques – How They Help And How To Use Them

By Finlay Games

On 07/15/2019

In Mental Health

A person holding a pencil on a coloring book with the words, How to use distraction techniques for mental health

Distraction techniques are an incredibly valuable tool in our mental health wellness kit, to help us to deal with overwhelming emotions and situations. For example, anxiety can feel impossible to sit with. Urges to harm ourselves can feel overwhelming. A low mood can mean our head is full of negative thoughts. Heightened emotions can feel so distressing that it becomes tempting to self-medicate with drugs or alcohol. I have had to manage all of these challenges in my own mental health journey and I understand how exhausting and difficult it can be. However, I have found that by learning to use distraction techniques, I have been able to find healthy ways to manage the most overwhelming of feelings.

First Stage Phalloplasty | A Guide to Recovering at Home

By Finlay Games

On 07/12/2019

In Phalloplasty

Person recovering in bed after first stage phalloplasty

The first stage of radial forearm free flap phalloplasty is the most recovery intensive. Not only does it take many weeks to heal, but there are also multiple affected areas. Therefore, recovery can feel like very hard work. However, with the right preparation beforehand, you can adapt your home and make things a lot easier for yourself. In the following blog, I share the things that I found helpful in my own recovery after first stage phalloplasty.