A New Year tradition of mine is to share my personal review of the year gone by. I realize of course that 2020 was on the whole a pretty bad year. However, nothing in life is black and white, in every bad event there are positives to be found. I shared in a recent blog how we can find the positives, by using tools for reflection. In this blog, I want to share my own reflections and positives, my personal highlights of 2020. These are my most memorable moments, and my business and personal achievements from 2020.
January 2020
Business Milestone -A Book Contract for My Phalloplasty Memoir
2020 started out with some incredible news. After submitting a proposal to Jessica Kingsley Publishers, I received the amazing news that I had secured a deal for my phalloplasty memoir!
If you are a newsletter subscriber and have been following my updates, you will know that we decided on the title. ‘Top to Bottom, A Memoir and Personal Guide Through Phalloplasty’. My partner came up with that title, and he is chuffed it was accepted!
Personal Highlight – Watching Snooker at Alexandra Palace
One of my most special moments from 2020 was watching the snooker at Alexandra Palace! Tickets have been an early birthday present from two very dear friends for the last few years.
This time then reminds me of the love I have in my life from the kindness of those around me. My few days alone in London, also remind me how far I have come in terms of my recovery from the impact of my mental health. Just a few short years ago, I would never have managed to travel to London, let alone stay in an Airbnb on my own!
February
Memorable Moment – My Birthday at The Upside Down House
This birthday was a tough one, as it came just after the first-year anniversary of losing mum. I had pretty much written the day off and just felt sad.
However, my amazing partner and best friend kidnapped me and took me to Brighton. We spent an hour in the Upside Down house, and I laughed myself silly! The day turned out to be one where as well as feeling sadness, I was also overwhelmed with love and gratitude for these two incredible people in my life.
Business Milestone -Attending My First Vidcon
I have been meaning to attend Vidcon for a while, the trouble is that tickets were not cheap. However, I decided it was worth the investment. and finally got myself a ticket.
It was such a great decision! I absolutely loved the weekend! I learned so much about optimizing my channel and developing myself as an entrepreneur. This has had a huge impact on the growth of my YouTube channel this year so it was a very worthwhile investment. It was also inspiring to see some of the larger YouTubers, and hope that perhaps one day I will be on a Vidcon panel!
March
Business Milestone – Launching YouTube Memberships
I became eligible for YouTube memberships at the beginning of Jan 2020, but I had been nervous about setting them up. I was worried about how it might impact my channel and subscribers.
Trying to make money as a content creator is tough. Part of my process of moving from a hobby to a business has been in learning to value my worth and asking for compensation for the content and services I provide. I went through this same process when I set up donations via my Ko-fi page.
Thanks to attending Vidcon, I was able to reframe how I felt and see the benefit of offering memberships. So in March, I launch them, of course with my love of sheep I called membership The Flock Club! I was surprised by how quickly a number of people signed up and it’s now a wonderful growing community. I am thrilled I decided to do this!
Business Milestone – Upgrading Ko-fi and Launching The Coffee Club
After the success of my YouTube memberships, I decided to also begin to reinvent my Ko-fi page. Previously, I had set up the option of monthly support in using K0-Fi Gold and had a number of people pledge monthly amounts.
I decided I wanted to create a membership club, like with YouTube, specifically for recurring monthly supporters, calling this The Coffee Club. Then, I added perks to make it similar to YouTube memberships, such as merch discounts and access to Discord.
I now have an even more growing community of people on both membership options and there are lots of exciting possibilities ahead!
Significant Moment – The Coronavirus Arrived In The UK
In March, the coronavirus arrived in the UK. Now, this certainly wasn’t a highlight, and still isn’t! However, there are many good things that have come from it, you just have to dig to find them!
Having the virus declared as a pandemic, and being put into lockdown, was terrifying. But, what came of it, was noticing how flexible and resilient I am, and how solid my mental health toolkit is.
The virus, the restrictions it caused, also helped to highlight how precious life is and to not take anything for granted. It really brought home all the things that are truly important in life.
April
Gender Transition Milestone – 7 Years on Testosterone
I cannot believe it’s been 7 years since my first testosterone injection! This is always a highlight of my year, a moment that floods my entire being with overwhelming gratitude for the life and body I have today.
May
Personal Milestone _ Our Two Year Anniversary
Chris and I always laugh when trying to work out how long we have been together. We feel like it has been a lifetime, in a very good way! He is not only my lover and soulmate, but my best friend.
Business Achievement – Completing and Submitting my Manuscript
In May, the deadline for submitting my manuscript arrived. It felt both wonderful and terrifying to press that send button! It also felt absolutely incredible to have written an entire book! This memoir has been many years in the making, as I have progressed through my surgery and to see it done makes me feel so proud! I have come a long way since I decided to start writing and had my first article published.
June/July
Significant Moment – Chris is Put Into Shielding
Despite the government’s promises of getting covid-19 under control, the pandemic continued to make life difficult. Even more worrying, Chris was identified as clinically extremely vulnerable.
Now once again, this was most definitely not a highlight! However, like with every moment of this pandemic, there were positives to be found. With Chris put into shielding (for readers not in the UK shielding basically means quarantine ) we were then both isolating at home. We had to work together to develop a schedule and routine and try to not kill each other being stuck indoors! And, despite my initial worries that his being at home might be a strain, we adapted so well. This really showed me how great a team we are and it brought us even closer together.
Memorable Moment – We Are Adopted by Johnathan Seagull
The weirdest thing about 2020, apart from the pandemic, was making friends with a seagull! We of course named him Johnathan!
Johnathan became a regular part of our day and routine. Many of you laughed with us as we shared Instagram footage of Johnathan making himself at home in our kitchen, and letting Chris hand feed him! He gave us many funny moments and brightened up our days when we were stuck indoors!
August
Personal Achievement – I Graduate from The Open University
Covid threw a spanner in the works with the final module of my degree. Unable to complete the final assessment, the OU decide to finish our course and average out the scores from the essays instead.
It was a scary time as I didn’t know if that meant I might drop a grade, especially as I had recently swapped to an Open Degree. But, the results came in, and I got first-degree honors! Oh my goodness I cannot tell you how pleased I am! My graduation ceremony has been put off though, due to covid, but that’s OK, I am happy to have a late one in 2021/22 when Rona is finally under more control.
Personal Achievement – Celebrating 10 Years Clean and Sober
August held many incredibly significant milestones. The most significant of all though has to be celebrating 10 years clean and sober, as it’s my sobriety that has given me a second chance in life.
None of the achievements I have in my life would even be possible if I was still drinking. To be a published author, to have gained a first-class honors degree, to have gone through gender transition, to be in a healthy loving relationship, all these things are possible because of my recovery. Celebrating 10 years was a very very emotional moment!
Gender Transition Milestone – 5 Years post Phalloplasty
This year saw another significant gender transition milestone. It’s now 5 years since my first stage of lower surgery. And, it’s two years since my final stage.
It feels incredible to have finally finished my entire gender transition. To have a body that reflects my gender completely is something I will never take for granted. For my body to feel like home rather than a torture chamber, is indescribably wonderful.
This milestone also made my phalloplasty forearm skin graft 5 years old too. It healed so well, though now of course I have had a tattoo that beautifully covers it.
It is wonderful to see how amazing my arm looks now that the tattoo has settled and to know my mum is memorialized in it too. Once corona goes away I look forward to finishing it.
Personal Milestone – I Start Having Counselling Sessions
Yes, this was a highlight of my year! That might seem strange to some people but honestly, there needs to be far more acceptance of therapy as it is so good for us.
I had been wanting to work with a counselor, as I felt like a lot of the grief around mum was stuck. And with the pandemic adding another complicated layer to my mental health, I knew it was the right time. Counselling brought some incredible realizations, both about my business and personal life, which totally changed the rest of my year.
September
New Business Adventures – Launching Coaching and Mentoring
Another positive of the pandemic has been in thinking differently about how to do things. Using zoom helped me to see some new and exciting possibilities for my business.
Alongside blogging and vlogging, I have been giving advice over email for years. The combination of becoming familiar with Zoom, and gaining my degree, gave me an intriguing idea. I realized that I could launch myself as a life coach and mentor, offering one to one sessions for advice and support. I’ve worked with a number of clients now and have loved doing so!
October
Memorable Moment – An Alternative Holiday, Carry on Caravanning!
With shielding over, Chris and I could, at last, go on a break. We both suffer in the winter and usually head for somewhere warm like Spain.
However, with the coronavirus still rampaging around the world and with Chris still vulnerable, going abroad was too much of a risk. We both felt sad but we decided to make the best of it, and we booked a caravan on the Kent coast. We just had lots of coastal walks and lots of laughs and once again, I was reminded of the magical simple things in life!
November
Gender Transition Milestone – 7 Years Post Top Surgery
Every year I fall more in love with my chest! The gratitude for a chest that is truly mine never gets old. Celebrating with a video is always one of my highlights!
Memoir Pre-orders Become Available
At the end of November, I received the exciting news that the final copy of my memoir was finished and pre-orders had been made available! This was such an exciting moment, to see my book listed online on booksellers’ websites!
I have recently made an exclusive video, where I read a section from a chapter of my book. It’s currently available to watch in two ways. You can sign up as a Flock Member and access the video. Or, anyone that donates one-off or monthly on my Kofi page can also watch it too!
December
Memorable Moment – A Very Surprising Proposal!
What a way to end 2020! To my complete surprise, my partner Chris got on one knee on Christmas day and asked me to marry him. Of course, I said yes!!!
I was not even slightly suspicious, I had no idea what Chris was planning. As you can see by the video, I am very confused and totally shocked! I think this has changed how I feel about Christmas! It was a perfect proposal, I feel so blessed to spend the rest of my life with this wonderful man.
Business Achievement – Reaching 15ooo Subscribers on YouTube
Wow! To reach 15,000 subscribers on YouTube is unbelievable;e! It’s amazing that I only made videos for myself, just as a hobby, and now here I am! I feel very blessed to be able to share my experiences and help to inspire and support others. What a wonderful gift that is!
One thing I am always grateful for, year in and year out, is my incredible FinnFam! Those of you who follow my blog and subscribe to my Youtube are more than followers, you are family to me. You always leave such kind comments, cheer me on in all my adventures, and support me in everything I do. Many of you even send wonderful cards and presents, which I have loved opening and sharing my joy with, in my monthly Finnstalment vlogs.
You have all been a blessing to me this year during the lockdown. Every year you are on my gratitude list, but especially so this year, thank you always for your love and support. Here’s to sharing another exciting year together!
Reflecting on goals from 2019
Strangely enough, and very unlike me, I didn’t actually set any goals for 2020. I did complete my 2019 review, and I was about to list some 2020 goals when the coronavirus pandemic arrived. Then it seemed sensible to abandon goals and just take things one day at a time. I decided to just concentrate on getting my memoir manuscript submitted and my degree finished, and just take everything else as it came.
2020 in Summary
I can honestly say then, that I have achieved far more than I expected! To manage to finish my memoir and my degree, whilst living in a pandemic, is quite an accomplishment! And, surprising new business developments have happened that I didn’t plan for either! This really demonstrates why keeping our minds open is important. Yes, goals are good, but so is letting life show you the way. This is often how the most surprising things happen.
So as you can see, despite this being the toughest year with the pandemic and the impact it has had on our mental wellbeing, there have been many high points, achievements, and celebrations to be proud of too.
How about you? Can you find some positives from the year? Moments to be proud of that help you to see this difficult 2020 in a new light? Let me know in the comments below!
Hello! My name is Finn and I have a passion for creating honest content, that inspires personal growth and promotes well-being.
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It is just so pleasant to read a mountain of positives regarding 2020. I hope it continues throughout 2021
Ah thank you so much! Re-reading this helps me to stay positive, despite the pandemic black cloud! Thanks for reading and commenting.