A little while ago, I decided I wanted to explore the option of writing for a living. Since that time, I have been on an incredible self-employment adventure! In today’s blog, I want to reflect on the goals I initially set and evaluate how things have turned out. Although this blog is more of a reflective piece, perhaps sharing my process may also be useful to someone who is in a similar position*.
I find myself torn between pride and concern on Coming Out Day. On the one hand, I love that our society has evolved to the point that we now celebrate people coming out. On the other hand, I wish it wasn’t a big deal. I look forward to the day where it doesn’t matter what our sexual orientation or gender identity is. A day when we just accept that people can fall in love with other people of any gender. A day when we also realise that gender isn’t straight forward and for some people, they need to define themselves differently. I can dream.
This week is Mental Health Awareness Week and I want to talk about why I began to share my mental health story. I also want to talk about why I think it is still important that I continue to do so. This blog has been written in support of the This Is Me campaign, which aims to raise awareness and change attitudes about mental health, by the sharing of personal stories.
Over the years since I began my recovery, I have been consciously invested in my self-growth. I love that feeling of shifting and changing and learning new things about myself. Sometimes, I will experience a sudden shift, seemingly out of the blue. A sudden shift is what appears to be happening to me at the moment, and I feel it is time to do some spring cleaning of my life.
Stress is problematic for us all. Left unchecked, stress can lead to increased anxiety and low mood. However, when you have existing mental health challenges, being mindful of stress becomes even more critical. In my mental health journey, I have learned that I must deal with stress quickly, to avoid any negative impact on my wellbeing. To do this, I created the acronym R.E.D.U.C.E to remind myself what I need to do to take care of myself as soon as I notice I am feeling stressed.
Chest dysphoria is extremely painful and understandably we want to find a surgeon as quickly as possible. However, it is important to take time to decide, so you can find the most suitable top surgery surgeon for your needs. In the following blog, I am going to share how I found my surgeon. I hope that these tips will help you to begin your own research process.
I feel compelled to write this blog to share some incredible news with you all. This week, I received the official confirmation, that I am to be a TEDx Open University speaker! This news comes at a poignant time for me, because this week, I also celebrate nine years clean and sober. Being given such an incredible opportunity stands as a testament to how far I have come. And to think, I worried that my sober life would be boring!
The hardest part of going through gender transition is coping with long waiting times. We wait for our first referral, for appointments in between, for hormones and surgery if we chose it. The relief first felt at realising we are trans, is soon replaced with anguish. The road ahead seems impossibly long and the mountain too high to climb. Understandably, our mental health often suffers as a result. Therefore, if we are to survive this process intact, we must learn ways to cope with the wait. In the following blog, I will share the top five things which helped me to get through my gender transition.
Phalloplasty, in being such a complicated procedure, comes with a lot of possible complications. A major concern for a lot of transgender people considering this surgery is the risk of loss of sensation. Losing sensation was certainly something I feared. However, thankfully, my fears have not been realised. In the following blog, I map out my phalloplasty sensation progress over the four years since I had my first stage phalloplasty.
Distraction techniques are an incredibly valuable tool in our mental health wellness kit, to help us to deal with overwhelming emotions and situations. For example, anxiety can feel impossible to sit with. Urges to harm ourselves can feel overwhelming. A low mood can mean our head is full of negative thoughts. Heightened emotions can feel so distressing that it becomes tempting to self-medicate with drugs or alcohol. I have had to manage all of these challenges in my own mental health journey and I understand how exhausting and difficult it can be. However, I have found that by learning to use distraction techniques, I have been able to find healthy ways to manage the most overwhelming of feelings.
The first stage of radial forearm free flap phalloplasty is the most recovery intensive. Not only does it take many weeks to heal, but there are also multiple affected areas. Therefore, recovery can feel like very hard work. However, with the right preparation beforehand, you can adapt your home and make things a lot easier for yourself. In the following blog, I share the things that I found helpful in my own recovery after first stage phalloplasty.
You can experience Glastonbury Festival in many different ways because it is so vast in size and varied in entertainment. For some, it might be a drunken five days and hazy memories. For me, it is the most awake five days I spend in a year because all my senses are on fire.
Glastonbury Festival you see is much more to me than just a music festival. It is a place in which I have gone through profound changes. I have attended the festival ten times, four of those times I was drunk, stoned and living a life that wasn’t mine. The last six times I have attended sober and as a completely new person, as a transgender man.
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